Women's Secret Family Planning

We had a very lively session on Family Planning! When I began training in Malawi 20 years ago there were lots of giggles and whispers of embarrassment and few would ask questions about family planning. This time we couldn't shut them up! What a fun group.

The first person to offer a definition of family planning said, "The husband and wife sit down and discuss how many children they want and when they want them to be born." I said, "Do all of you have the cooperation of your husbands?" The room erupted with chatter and everyone taking at once. The bottom line was that virtually none of them felt their husbands wanted family planning or would even discuss it. When I asked how they handled that, they said by doing "Women's Secret Family Planning." Angela, one of our long-term workers from a very poor area said, "I just tell my husband I'm sick and need to go to the clinic. Then I write a letter and sign my husband's name to take with me saying he wants me to get family planning. At the clinic I choose a method he won't notice." There were lots of heads nodding that they do something similar. Some of the most popular methods were injections and the loop. One of the Sinkhani said a good method was to take a rope and tie 6 knots in it. You then put the knots around your waist so your husband has something to play with. When I asked "Does it work?" Everyone started laughing and said "No" but it is a traditional belief.

When I asked if condoms were common, they shook their heads no. Someone then said, "The men think that's like eating candy with the wrapper on."

We had a good follow-up discussion on HIV/AIDS and the role that condoms play in preventing the transmission. Lots of laughter and open sharing. What a long way they've come in the intervening years since the first training.